But, the truth is, I'm pretty satisfied with my zodiac destination. Being born in the month of August, I am the fiery Leo. And sure, most of my supposed traits are forms of "stubborn" and "vain" but most astrological guides use much more flattering terms like "proud" and "self-assured" and "likes to be the center of attention." (That last one is a good one, right?)
Plus, it gets better. I know, you're thinking - how? I see you sitting there, half forcing yourself to keep reading this sentence, hoping that perhaps something good will come out of it - and be assured, something will. Not only am I a Leo, but by the Chinese zodiac, I was born in the year of the dragon. That's right. I am a LionDragon.
When I roar, things get set on fire. |
So yeah, maybe I haven't checked my horoscope since the last time I picked up a hard copy newspaper (uh, let's see? 2006?), but I am pretty thrilled with the timing of my birth.
You all might remember that there was a big to-do earlier this year about how the zodiac signs as we know them were supposedly off by as much as a month. The theory was that when the ancient Babylonians mapped out the zodiac some three thousand years ago, the Earth was tilted on its axis at a specific angle that has actually changed over time.
I read the articles and began to wonder. What if I was wrong? What if I wasn't a Leo? I tried to tell myself that since it really didn't matter to me to begin with, why would it matter now? In fact, it made a lot of sense that I was a Cancer! I started writing a list.
There was my love for water! (I can't swim).
There was the fact that I hated change! (I moved from IL to FL).
Sometimes I could be intensely moody! (But usually only at a certain time during the month).
I stared at the list and could feel it staring up at me with beady little crab eyes, willing me to accept this change.
But I just couldn't.
Because I knew that it just couldn't work out. Because you know what happens when you get a dragon and a crab together?
Crab cakes.
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